A lot of us grew up hearing well-intentioned grownups say things like, “Stand up for yourself! Your opinion is as good as anyone else’s!” This was supposed to build up self-esteem but it can end up creating narcissism or, if not to that level of pathology, a very disagreeable arrogance.

An opinion, after all, is supposed to be based on knowledge. It’s different than a preference, which is more a matter of liking something. So I might have an opinion that one kind of food is healthier (based on facts) but have a tremendous preference for another (based on its taste).

In Toxic Mythology (© 2015), I addressed this for a full chapter. You have no doubt encountered people who have opinions on everything, even if they have no real knowledge on which to base that opinion. An opinion, after all, is supposed to be based on knowledge and expertise. Its value (to others) comes from that knowledge and expertise.   I suspect that a lot of people feel anxious about not having an opinion, as if it means they are foolish, uninformed, or wishy-washy. If it’s something critical to your life, then you probably ought to be doing the homework to develop an informed opinion. If it is something about which you have no interest and no need for interest, why do you care? Is your insecurity about being judged leading you to pass judgment on things and situations about which you have insufficient information?

Punt on having an opinion when you’re lacking information. It’s easier than you might think:

“I don’t know enough about that topic to have an opinion. What are your thoughts?”

“I haven’t looked it into sufficiently to really have a full picture. What sources would you recommend?”

See, that was easy.

Dr. Lori Puterbaugh

© 2016

Posts are for information and entertainment purposes only and should not be construed to be therapeutic advice. If you are in need of mental health assistance, please contact a licensed professional in your area.